Think before you....react

I guess with the economy and the state of my job (more on that in another post), I have been a little tense these days. Who wouldn't with the DOW going up and down and if only I knew what it even means. In any case, my fuse is short, lately.

We were running late to a birthday party for a friend of my oldest son. It was in the local mall at an arcade. In an effort to get there "late" and not "late, late", I opted out of the normal treasure hunt for a parking space and parked at the first one I saw. Of course, it was the last one on the row. Thoughts in the back of my mind were---I'll move once I get him situated at the party. Did I mention, I had my two year old, as well? So, there was no moving fast, just moving. Which in our case is really good. So, we rush inside--birthday present, kids, stroller, purse, me....all the essentials. I drop off the kid, tell birthday mom I'll be right back and off I go back to my truck.

I decided to take the longer route through the mall because I wanted to buy a new comforter. I bought the new comforter on the way to the truck. Malls are always full of young people ages 14-24, always. Of course, you can guess the next part of the story deals with some punk kids.

At this point, I'm walking fast through the mall to get to my truck so that I can make it back to the party before the Happy Birthday song. I don't want to seem like I just randomly drop my kids off. Anyway, I passed two young men* on the way out of the doors. You know how you do that whole exchange of the head nods and the non-flirtatious smile? Just, simply, being cordial. That is what happened between me the two boys/men--whatever they were. I just know they were young. I thought nothing of it until their demeanor changed. As I moved pass, I heard one making kissing sounds and the other saying "Hmmm, mmmm!" as if he has just had some of my gramma's greens or something. Before I realized it, I turned around and with a real bitch-like look and snapped "Oh, you couldn't say the to my face? Maaan, Uuppp!" The said the word up so hard, I swear spit didn't just fly out of my mouth, it blasted out like a space rocket. I could have capped it off by grabbing my invisible balls but a mother can't exactly do that while coasting a stroller with a big comforter on top and a baby in tow.

Let me back track the story to about a year and a half ago. There was a shooting in the parking lot of this very same mall between two teenagers. They had real guns and were shooting in the parking lot in broad daylight. My memory reminds me of this, at the very moment my bitching is complete. So, now the paranoid and scary me starts speed walking through the parking lot. My toddler is excited because now he is rolling fast. I never looked back at the two guys for fear of...I guess getting shot in the face...I don't know. Guess, I'd rather get shot in the back (extreme sarcasm).

I made it to my car, tossed in the baby, the comforter, my purse and ran to the drivers side, cranked it up and sped away. Whew! I made it with out getting shot from the guys who I later realized never even posed a threat and were probably laughing at me because of my actions, if they even paid attention at all.

Of course, paranoid and scary me has not realized that my baby is not buckled in until we turn a corner to go around the parking lot of the mall. I heard him in the back seat whining "Mommy!" Upon looking back there, I saw he was trying to climb into his seat and my driving was flopping him around, obviously preventing any car seat riding for him. Finally, the paranoid and scary me disappeared and the embarrassed me appeared. I parked in my new spot close to the arcade and retrieved my baby from the back seat.

My thoughts: I am acting so stupid and paranoid! Stop this!

Calmly, I gave him a big hug and kiss to make sure he felt loved. With that thought, we walked into the mall, unknowingly leaving my purse in the truck with the doors unlocked. Don't worry I realized it about the time we were leaving the party! You don't have to tell me, that my brain is scattered!


*They were really boys-I was just being nice.